Matilda, Mina, Lucy, Antonia, Agnes | Dissertation Diaries #6

I am so exhausted, and burnt out. I’ve been working on my dissertation draft for the last week and I feel like I’ve got nowhere. I’ve actually got 2950 words out of 8,000, and I’ve only written the introduction, and the first half of the first section. I’m going to over run big time, and then I’ll have the issue of what to cut out!

I feel like this combination of creating a dissertation that discuss’ two noevls, and the issues of female characters in society, and becoming abject is a lot. I’ve got a basic plan, then I’ve got  a detailed plan of every section, and then I’m planning out each paragraph, and it’s just so time consuming. Another thing with me is that I just can’t type what I’m going to say on to a word document I’ve got to write it out first, and then I type it up, and as I’m typing it up I kind of draft it, modify bits, elaborate on some bits, and cut some bits out.

On top of the argument having a really well thought out structure, and each paragraph having structure, I feel like every sentence has to have perfect syntax structure because if you’ve got a clunky awkward sentence just before your getting to the main point, then the person reading your arguments just going to get put off, or confused!

I should be pretty use to this by now, and all this essay structuring malarkey, but I feel like for me it takes ages, and ages, to assimilate ideas into coherent arguments. I have to do hand movements to go along with the flow of ideas in my brain, and talk to myself, and make flow charts of my ideas, and then hand write it out, and then type it out. It’s a bit excessive before I actually get down and do the work! How much have I got to plan?

I know this is the longest piece of work I’ve ever written in my uni life. Most of the essays I’ve written as an undergrad have been between 1,000-3,500 words, so my dissertation is more than double. I know your dissertation is meant to be challenging, and soul destroying; but I hope I’ll look back on it and be like “wow, I did that, and even though it was stressful I dealt with with and got an alright mark”. Even though, after I’ve written it, and drafted it so many times I’ll probably never want to read it again!

Sometimes, I feel like the only names I’m thinking of are Matilda, Mina, Lucy, Antonia, and Agnes; those women have taken over my mind. I don’t even know anymore. I was meant to send my draft off today, but I’m going to send it tomorrow evening, and hope my dissertation supervisor still has time to read it. I’m seeing him next Thursday so, he should have time.

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In other news, I’m really chuffed with myself today because if you remember in my blog post about my Modernism essay, then you’ll remember how much I was worried about it but I got my marks back today, and it got a first, and it’s the highest marks I’ve ever received!

Read my last dissertation post on how to conquer your dissertation

Read my first dissertation diary

I hope you guys are enjoying these dissertation diaries, and tell me if you’re doing a dissertation or final project in the comments – How’s it going? If you’re blogging about it then please leave a link to your post because I love reading student blogs!

And, don’t forget to like, and subscribe if you haven’t already!

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